My coach referred me to a book on Bruce Lee’s philosophy written by his daughter Shannon Lee and titled after his famous quote “Be Water, My Friend”. I have often resolved to be fluid and adapt to situations to succeed amid adversity, this book provided me with science and philosophy that leads to benefits of fluidity.
The Water Way: Embrace the characteristics of water – being formless, shapeless and taking the shape of the container it is placed in. Always look for paths to flow around obstacles rather than being stuck in resistance. The basic principles of water that can guide our way:
- No limitation: be unstoppable
- Be aware: be fully present and accountable in the face of challenging scenarios and people
- Be pliable: be flexible to adapt to situations
- Have appropriate tension: on-guard position that is both relaxed yet active
- Be purposeful
- Be whole
The Empty Cup: The usefulness of a cup is in its emptiness. Learning will not happen when we approach a problem thinking we already know the root cause. Adopt choiceless awareness – approach all that is happening around us without judging it, without making a choice or creating a story about it while maintaining full awareness of it. The notion of emptying our cup is the idea of letting go of the past and the future in favour of the present.
The Eternal Student: When we embrace the water way and empty our cup all the time, we make new discoveries every day and will be in a constant state of learning.
The Opponent: To know oneself is to study oneself in action with another person. Life is not a competition, it is a co-creation. There are no winners and losers, overcoming the six diseases below will help us move from a sense of striving to the simple, active state of living:
- The desire for victory
- The desire to resort to technical cunning
- The desire to display all that has been learned
- The desire to awe the enemy
- The desire to play the passive role
- The desire to rid oneself of whatever disease one is affected by
The Obstacle: We will always encounter obstacles in pursuit of our dreams. We need to be aware of the negative emotions that blunt our resolve to succeed – worry makes a problem out of the problem, pessimism makes a problem harder by implying it is impossible to solve, fear stops us from attacking the problem as we are afraid of failing, doubt gives an excuse not to solve the problem. The way to walk on when faced with obstacles is to gather our will power and stay focused on our dream.
The Rainstorm: No matter what, you must let your inner light guide you out of the darkness. There will be times we will be hit hard by adversity, we must keep faith and stay focused on our purpose.
The Living Void: The four stages of cultivation that can lead us to the state of nirvana embracing the water way:
- Stage 1 – Partiality: This is where most of us start and this is unconscious behaviour. There is inexperience and wildness in what we do, without refined technique and skill. We may get things done but without awareness.
- Stage 2 – Fluidity: We reach this stage when we have acknowledged that we have a lot to learn and begin work on ourselves. It is a stage of budding conscious awareness. We are open, engaged in learning and bettering ourselves. We learn how to accept the ever-changing nature of life and to work with rather than against it.
- Stage 3 – Emptiness: In this stage of maturity, we are unlimited. We stand at the centre point of possibility with the ability to move in any direction. This is no longer tactical readiness but rather total awareness with instantaneous expression. At this stage, some magical things start to happen:
- Our pace quickens
- We feel powerful
- We feel safe
- Stage 4 – Jeet Kune Do: Using no way as way, having no limitation as limitation.
Be Water, My Friend is more than just a book about Bruce Lee’s philosophy—it is a guide to living with adaptability, resilience, and purpose. By embracing the fluid nature of water, emptying our cup to stay open to learning, and overcoming obstacles with unwavering focus, we cultivate a mindset that enables growth and transformation. Life isn’t about rigid control but about flowing with challenges and opportunities alike. The ultimate goal is to reach a state of mastery where we move with effortless awareness—using no way as way, having no limitation as limitation.